To Laugh
by jamesandlilypotter81
Summary: There was a time she and James Potter got along perfectly well. Despite having acted like an absolute berk on the train—and despite the fervent promises to herself that she'd never forgive Potter for treating Severus so badly—by the end of September of their first year at Hogwarts, Lily Evans considered James a friend.


To Laugh

There was a time she and James Potter got along perfectly well.

Despite having acted like an absolute berk on the train—and despite the fervent promises to herself that she'd _never_ forgive Potter for treating Severus so badly—by the end of September of their first year at Hogwarts, Lily Evans considered James a friend.

It was true that she didn't consider him as close a friend as Mary or Marlene—and James certainly had tested her patience several times—but he was still a friend. It was astonishing, really.

She didn't like him for his wit or his charm, as he liked to think. He was under the false impression that she thought him impressive, intelligent, and worthwhile. But really, and it somewhat embarrassed her to admit it, she liked James purely because he had the very unique ability of laughing at himself.

She had grown up around very proud parents. They were both doctors, respected and well-liked, and they acted accordingly. It meant there was very little time to be frivolous enough to show enjoyment—very little time to laugh with one another, or to laugh at themselves.

Her sister, of course, appreciated their parents' manner. Petunia Evans believed that one should act in a way to never arouse the attention of neighbors or friends, to never be the subject of anything but _good_ gossip. Lily's going to Hogwarts was a source of utter shame for her as it went against everything she had been raised to believe.

Petunia very often conveniently forgot that their parents had no issue with a witch being in the family. Despite the fact that they considered it to be a wonderful surprise, Petunia scorned everything that went against the perfect image she had built up over the years.

As for Severus, well, Lily didn't think Severus was even _capable_ of laughing at himself. It wasn't because he was too proud, too arrogant, to do so. She often thought it was more because Severus felt he had so much to prove. He thought that if he worked hard enough, accomplished enough, then he separate his mother from his father, and he could save her.

Severus didn't laugh at himself because he didn't have the time.

The other 'Marauders' didn't laugh at themselves either. Peter was far too self-conscious, Sirius too arrogant, and Remus too meek. Not even her closest friends, Mary and Marlene, could deign to laugh at themselves. Both girls never even thought of the idea of laughing at their own follies.

It wasn't that the people she knew at Hogwarts were bad, of course. Actually, she found she had the best of friends in Hogwarts, had found the very place she belonged—a place far away from her parents' expectations and her sister's judgments. And Lily, who had a disposition far different from her parents and her sister, firmly believed that one _should_ be able to laugh at themselves. It wasn't a weakness, but rather a strength. To her, it meant you noticed your faults, your mistakes, and rather than ignoring them, you actually acknowledged them and—by laughing at it—had endeavored to fix it.

Laughing at yourself was the first step to making yourself a better person.

So when James had accidentally set his robes on fire in Potions in the first week of classes back in first year, Lily hadn't expected much from him. Perhaps an embarrassed shrug, or red cheeks. Yet, he had shocked her. Once the fire was put out, he had let out a genuine—and perhaps slightly relieved as he was no longer on fire—laugh, and grinned at Professor Slughorn.

"Well, that'll teach me to never talk when lighting my cauldron again," he had said, letting out another laugh. Severus had thought James big-headed, arrogant. He said that James was full of nothing but air, and that his conduct in Potions proved it. Mary, on the other hand, had said that James just proved himself to be stupid.

But Lily thought rather favorably of him. Because she thought that James had shown a kind of character that she had seen rarely, a temperament that she found she greatly valued.

James Potter, pureblood, rich, and proud, laughed at himself a great deal.

Of course, James's more…questionable…traits soon irritated her to no end. His incessant chatter, all the cruel pranks, and his blatant disregard for the rules made him lose any favor she may have had for him. Soon enough, the rivalry between Lily Evans and James Potter was well-known throughout the entire school; everyone knew how much she hated him, and how much of a prat she thought him to be.

Yet, there was one thing that Lily never admitted to anyone—not even to her best friend. Despite all their yelling and arguing, the fighting and competition between the two of them, she still found his ability to laugh at himself to be something she respected.

And her irritation with James, her disappointment—and sometimes her anger—never turned into anything more negative. Because she could never forget that there was a time the two of them got along perfectly well.

So though he had just knocked over an entire bookcase in the library—because the stupid prat wasn't paying attention to where he was pointing his wand as he did his Charms homework—Lily ignored her Prefect senses which were going into overdrive. Instead, she just watched as he laughed—embarrassedly and nervously—at himself.

Of course, she didn't notice the small smile that appeared on her lips, the way her eyes softened, and the tenderness of her expression. She didn't realize that she ignored his stupidity not because he had the rather rare ability of laughing at himself, but for a reason that she probably had been nursing from the day he had set his robes on fire in Potions.

Because it had been a long time that Lily had failed to recognize that she didn't respect James's ability to laugh at himself. She had come to love it.

**Well, I hoped you liked it! Please leave me review, if you don't mind. It'd be quite kind. **


End file.
